പ്രിയപ്പെട്ട അച്ഛന് - A Fathers Day Memoir

പ്രിയപ്പെട്ട അച്ഛന്,

എന്‍റെ കഥകളോ, കവിതകളോ ഒന്നും അങ്ങ് വായിച്ചിട്ടില്ല എന്നറിയാം. എന്നാല്‍ എനിക്കൊരിക്കലും അങ്ങയോട് പറയുവാന്‍ സാധിക്കാത്ത ചില നിമിഷങ്ങള്‍ ഞാന്‍ ഇ “Fathers Day”ല്‍ പറയുവാന്‍ ആഗ്രഹിക്കുന്നു. എന്നെങ്കിലും അങ്ങ് ഇത് കാണും എന്ന ഒരു പ്രതീക്ഷയോടെ.

“അച്ഛന്‍” എന്ന് ഓര്‍ക്കുമ്പോള്‍ അങ്ങയുടെ അചഞ്ചലമായ മുഖമാണ് എന്നും എന്‍റെ മനസ്സില്‍. ഒരു പ്രതിസന്തിയിലും തളരാതെ, അല്ലെങ്കില്‍ ഒരിക്കലും ഞങ്ങളെ അറിയിക്കാതെ, വേദന സ്വയം കടിച്ചമര്‍ത്തി പുറത്ത് ചിരിതൂകി നില്‍ക്കുന്ന വ്യക്തി. കുഞ്ഞുനാളിലെ അച്ഛനെ എനിക്ക് അമ്മയിലൂടെയെ അറിയൂ. എന്‍റെ കൈപിടിച്ച് നേന്ത്ര പഴം വാങ്ങിത്തരാന്‍ കൊണ്ട് പോകുമായിരുന്ന അച്ഛന്‍, എന്നും സുഖമില്ലാതെയാവുന്ന എന്നെയും തോളില്‍ ഇട്ടു ആശുപത്രിയില്‍ ഓടുന്ന അച്ഛന്‍. ഇങ്ങനെ നിറം മങ്ങിയ കുറെ ഓര്‍മ്മകള്‍, എന്നാല്‍ എന്‍റെ ബാല്യം തൊട്ടു ഇന്നുവരെയുള്ള ഒരു ഓര്‍മകള്‍ക്കും നിറം ഒട്ടും മങ്ങിയിട്ടില്ല, ഒരിക്കലും മങ്ങുകയുമില്ല. എല്ലാം നല്ലവ ആയിരുന്നില്ല എങ്കിലും ഓരോ ഓര്‍മയുടെ കണികയിലും അങ്ങയിലെ പിതാവിന്‍റെ വ്യത്യസ്ത മുഖങ്ങള്‍ ഞാന്‍ കാണുന്നു. ചിലവ എന്നെ, അച്ഛന്‍ എങ്ങനെ ആയിരിക്കണം എന്ന് പടിപിച്ചു, മറ്റുചിലത് എങ്ങനെ ആയിരിക്കരുത് എന്നും.

ഇന്ന് ഞാന്‍ ഒരു അച്ഛനാണ്. കുഞ്ഞി കൈകാലിളക്കി കളിക്കുന്ന ഒരു പോന്നോമനയുടെ അച്ഛന്‍. അവന്‍ എന്നെ നോക്കി ചിരിചെങ്കില്‍ എന്ന് ആശിച്ചു പോകാറുണ്ട്, എന്‍റെ കൈപിടിച്ച് നടന്നെങ്കില്‍ എന്ന് ആഗ്രഹിക്കാറുണ്ട്. എല്ലാ കാര്യങ്ങള്‍ക്കും അവന്‍ അമ്മയെ ആശ്രയിക്കുമ്പോള്‍ വെറുതെ എങ്കിലും ഒരു ചെറിയ അസൂയ മനസ്സില്‍ തോന്നാറുണ്ട്, അവന്‍ അമ്മയെ മാത്രം ഇഷ്ടപെടുമോ എന്നൊക്കെ മനസ്സില്‍ ആശങ്ക പെടാറുണ്ട്. ഞാന്‍ അങ്ങയുടെ പുത്രനായി ജനിച്ചപ്പോള്‍ ഒരു പക്ഷെ അങ്ങും ഇങ്ങനെ ആയിരിക്കാം.

കുട്ടികാലത്ത്, അങ്ങ് ജോലി കഴിഞ്ഞു വരുമ്പോള്‍ എന്നും ഒരു കുഞ്ഞു പൊതി കരുതുമായിരുന്നു. വാഴയിലയില്‍ പൊതിഞ്ഞ പലഹാരങ്ങള്‍ ഞാന്‍ കഴിക്കുമ്പോള്‍ അങ്ങ് സന്തോഷിച്ചിരിക്കണം. ഒരു പക്ഷെ ഞാന്‍ ഉറങ്ങി പോയെങ്കില്‍ രാവിലെ അമ്മയോടുള്ള ആദ്യത്തെ ചോദ്യം ഇതായിരിക്കും.

“അമ്മാ, ഇന്നലെ അച്ഛന്‍ അപ്പം വാങ്ങില്ലേ”?

സൂക്ഷിച്ചു വച്ച പലഹാര പൊതി കയ്യില്‍ കിട്ടുന്നവരേക്കും എനിക്ക് സമാധാനം ഇല്ലായിരുന്നു. പിന്നെ ലാലി നമ്മുടെ ജീവിതത്തിലേക്ക് വന്നു. അന്ന് ഒരു ജേഷ്ട്ടനായി മാറിയ എന്നെ അലോസരപെടുത്തിയ ഒരു കാര്യമ്മുണ്ടായിരുന്നു, നിങ്ങളുടെ സമയം മെല്ലെ എനിക്ക് ലഭിക്കാതെ വരുന്നത് പോലെ. ജീവിതത്തിലെ ആദ്യത്തെ സ്ഥാനകയറ്റം അത്രകണ്ട് ഞാന്‍ ഇഷ്ട്ടപെട്ടിരുന്നില്ല. നിരത്താതെയുള്ള കുഞ്ഞിപെങ്ങളുടെ കരച്ചില്‍ എന്ത് കൊണ്ടാണെന്നറിയില്ല ഞാന്‍ ഒരു തീക്കൊള്ളി കൊണ്ട് ആ തോട്ടിലിലൂടെ പിഞ്ചു ശരിരം വെധനിപിച്ചപ്പോള്‍ ഒരിക്കലും ഞാന്‍ ചെയ്യുന്ന തെറ്റിന്റെ ആഴം എനിക്ക് അറിയുമായിരുന്നില്ല.

കുടയെടുക്കാന്‍ ഞാന്‍ ആ പലകയുടെ സ്റ്റാന്‍ഡില്‍ വലിഞ്ഞു കേറി കുടയുടെ മുകളില്‍ വീണപ്പോള്‍, അങ്ങ് ആ കുടകമ്പി കൊണ്ടെന്നെ തല്ലിയത് ആ തെറ്റ് ഇനി ആവര്‍ത്തിക്കാതിരിക്കാനും, ആ കുടകമ്പി എന്‍റെ ദേഹത്ത് തുളഞു കേറിയിരുന്നെകില്‍ എന്ന ചിന്ത കൊണ്ടുമാണെന്ന് മനസില്ലാക്കാന്‍ എനിക്ക് കാലങ്ങള്‍ എടുത്തു എങ്കിലും, അങ്ങയുടെ അടിയില്‍ ഞാന്‍ നിലത്തു വീഴുമ്പോഴും നാട്ടുകാര്‍ കാണ്‍കെ എന്നെ തല്ലിയതിനായിരുന്നു എനിക്ക് കൂടുതല്‍ വിഷമം.

അങ്ങയുടെ രീതികള്‍ എന്നെ നല്ലൊരു മനുഷ്യന്‍ ആക്കാനുള്ളവയായിരുന്നു എന്നെനിക്കറിയാം, പക്ഷെ അങ്ങ് എന്നും ഒരു വിട്ടുവീഴ്ചയില്ലാത്ത പിതാവായിരുന്നു, അങ്ങയുടെ കര്‍ശനമായ ചിട്ടകളും, നിര്‍ദ്ദേശങ്ങളും ഞങ്ങള്‍ പാലിക്കുന്നുണ്ടെന്ന് അങ്ങ് ഉറപ്പു വരുത്തിയിരുന്നു. അന്ന് അത് ഞങ്ങളെ കുറച്ചൊന്നും അല്ല ആലോസരപെടുതിയത്. സ്കൂള്‍ അടച്ച അന്ന് രാത്രി തന്നെ അങ്ങ് എനിക്ക് കുറെ പുസ്തകങ്ങള്‍ കൊണ്ട് തരുമായിരുന്നു, മുക്യവയും ‘cursive writing’ പരിശീലിക്കാനുള്ള പുസ്തകങ്ങള്‍. എന്നും രാത്രി അങ്ങ് അത് വാങ്ങി പരിശോധിക്കുമായിരുന്നു. ഇവയൊക്കെ ജീവിതത്തില്‍ ചിട്ടയും, നല്ല ശീലങ്ങളും പടിപ്പിക്കാനയിരുന്നു എന്ന് അറിയില്ലായിരുന്നു.

അങ്ങയുടെ കര്‍ശനമായ നിലപാടുകള്‍ എന്നെ ഒരു മര്യാദ പുരുഷോത്തമന്‍ ആക്കിയില്ല എങ്കിലും, നല്ലൊരു മനുഷ്യനാക്കി എന്നത് ഒരു ഗര്‍വോടെ തന്നെ പറയാന്‍ കഴിയും. തുച്ഛമായ ശമ്പളം വാങ്ങുപോഴും ഞങ്ങളെ ഏറ്റവും നല്ല ഇംഗ്ലീഷ് മീഡിയം സ്കൂളുകളില്‍ പടിപിച്ചു. ദേഷ്യം വരുമ്പോള്‍ അത് ഏതൊരു അച്ഛന്റെയും കടമയാണ് എന്നോര്‍ക്കുംപോഴും എന്‍റെ ചില സുഹൃത്തുക്കളുടെ അച്ചന്മാരെ പോലെ അങ്ങേക്കും എന്ത് വേണമെങ്കിലും തീരുമാനിക്കാമായിരുന്നു. ഒരു പക്ഷെ ഇന്ന് എന്‍റെ ജീവിതം മറ്റൊന്ന് ആകുമായിരുന്നു.

രണ്ടു ദിവസം തിരുവനന്തപുരത്തെ കലോത്സവത്തിന് പോകുമ്പോള്‍ അങ്ങ് ഞങ്ങളെ കാണാന്‍ എത്തിയിരുന്നു. ഇന്ന് അത് ഒരു പുതിയ കാര്യമല്ല എന്നാല്‍ കലോത്സവത്തിന് ഒരു തരിമ്പു പോലും പ്രാധാന്യം നല്‍കാത്ത തമിഴ്നാട്ടിലെ നാട്ടിന്‍പുറത്ത്ക്കാര്‍ക്ക് അതൊന്നും ചിന്തിക്കാന്‍ പോലും ആകുമായിരുന്നില്ല.

എന്നെ ഇത്രയധികം വിശ്വാസമുള്ള ഒരു വ്യക്തി ഇ ലോകത്ത് എന്‍റെ അമ്മ മാത്രമായിരുന്നു എന്നായിരുന്നു എന്‍റെ വിശ്വാസം, കാരണം അങ്ങ് എന്നെ ഒരിക്കല്‍ പോലും പ്രശംസിച്ചിരുനില്ല. ഒന്നാം റാങ്കു നേടിയാല്‍, മാര്‍ക്ക് കുറവായധിനു എന്നെ ദേഷ്യപെട്ടിരുന്നു. പക്ഷെ തുച്ചമായ എന്‍റെ വിജയങ്ങളില്‍ അഹങ്കരിക്കാതെ മുന്നോട്ടുള്ള പാതയില്‍ വരുന്ന ദുര്‍ഘടമായ ഖട്ടങ്ങളെ തരണം ചെയ്യാന്‍ അങ്ങെന്നെ പടിപ്പിക്കുകകയായിരുന്നു എന്ന് ഇന്ന് മനസിലായി. സ്കൂള്‍ വാര്‍ഷികത്തില്‍ താലം നിറയെ സമ്മാനങ്ങളുമായി ഞാന്‍ അങ്ങയുടെ അടുത്തെതുംപോഴും, ആകെ നിറഞ്ഞൊരു ചിരി മാത്രമായിരുന്നു എന്‍റെ പ്രചോദനം. ഞാന്‍ പോയി കഴിയുമ്പോള്‍ അങ്ങയുടെ മുഖത്തെ സന്തോഷം, അഭിമാനം അമ്മ എനിക്ക് പറഞ്ഞു കേള്‍പ്പിക്കുമായിരുന്നു.

പിന്നെ അങ്ങയുടെ ഏറ്റവും വലിയ സമ്മാനം എന്‍റെ കുഞ്ഞനുജന്‍ ആയിരുന്നു. അവനിലൂടെ എന്‍റെ ജീവിതത്തില്‍ ഉണ്ടാവുന്ന മാറ്റങ്ങള്‍ ഞാന്‍ ശ്രദ്ധിച്ചു. അങ്ങ് എനിക്ക് നിഷേധിച്ചിരുന്ന സ്വാതന്ത്ര്യങ്ങള്‍ അവനു നല്‍കാന്‍ ഞാന്‍ തിരക്ക് കൂട്ടി. ഇന്നും അവന്‍റെ മാനുഷിക മുല്യങ്ങളും, ജീവിതത്തെ നേരിടുന്ന വിധങ്ങളും കാണുന്പോള്‍ ഞാന്‍ തെറ്റിയില്ല എന്നെനിക്കു തോന്നാറുണ്ട്.

എന്‍റെ ആദ്യത്തെ വിദേശ യാത്ര മറക്കാനാവുന്നതല്ല. ചിത്ര ഹോസ്പിറ്റലിലെ ഇരുണ്ട ഇടനാഴിയില്‍ മീശയൊക്കെ വടിച്ചു അവര്‍ തന്ന വസ്ത്രവും ഇട്ടു അങ്ങയെ കാണുകയും, ജീവന് ഒരു ഉറപ്പുമില്ല എന്ന് ഡോക്ടര്‍ പറഞ്ഞു കേട്ട് തിരികെ നടക്കുമ്പോള്‍ എന്‍റെ ഹൃദയം പൊട്ടി പോകും എന്ന് ഭയപെട്ടിരുന്നു. ഭന്ധുക്കള്‍ എന്തും കേള്‍ക്കാന്‍ തയാറായി നില്‍ക്കു എന്ന് പറഞ്ഞു എന്നെ യാത്ര അയക്കുമ്പോള്‍ അങ്ങയുടെ തളര്‍ന്ന മുഖത്തില്‍ എന്നെ വിഷമിപ്പിക്കാതിരിക്കാന്‍ ഒളിപിച്ച ചിരിയും, ഒരു തുള്ളി വെള്ളം പോലും കുടിക്കാതെ കരയുന്ന എന്‍റെ അമ്മയും, എന്നെ കെട്ടി പിടിച്ചു കരഞ്ഞ എന്‍റെ കുഞ്ഞനിയനും, പെങ്ങളും എന്‍റെ മനസ്സില്‍ മാറി മാറി വന്നു കൊണ്ടിരുന്നു. തിരികെയെത്തി അങ്ങയുടെ മുഖം കാണുന്ന വരേയ്ക്കും ജീവിതത്തില്‍ അങ്ങ് വഹിച്ച പങ്കു എത്ര വലതാണെന്ന് എന്നെ കാലം പടിപ്പിക്കുകകയായിരുന്നു.

പനിബാധിച്ചു കിടപ്പിലായ ഞാന്‍ മെല്ലെ ഉണരുമ്പോള്‍, എന്‍റെ തലയില്‍ തലോടുന്ന അങ്ങയെയാണ് കണ്ടത്. കടലോളം സ്നേഹം ഉള്ളില്‍ ഒതിക്കിയ ഒരു പിതാവിനെ തിരിച്ചറിയാന്‍ ആ ഒരു ചെറിയ സ്പര്‍ശം മതി ആയിരുന്നു എനിക്ക്. തിരികെ ജോലിക്ക് കയറിയ ഞാന്‍ ഒരു പുതിയ തിരിച്ചറിവിന്‍റെ ആവേശത്തിലായിരുന്നു. പിന്നെ അങ്ങയെ ഞാന്‍ വിളിക്കാന്‍ ശ്രദ്ധിച്ചിരുന്നു. അപ്പോഴൊക്കെയും അമ്മയോട് ഞാന്‍ വിളിച്ചു എന്ന് സന്തോഷത്തോടെ പറയും എന്ന് അമ്മ പറയാറുണ്ടായിരുന്നു.

എന്‍റെ എല്ലാ പ്രശ്നങ്ങള്‍ക്കും അങ്ങ് ഒരു നിഴലായി, ഒരു താങ്ങായി തണലായി എന്‍റെ കൂടെ ഉണ്ടായിരുന്നു. എന്‍റെ ജീവിതം അകാലത്തില്‍ പൊലിയും എന്ന് ഉറപ്പിച്ചപ്പോഴും, ഒരു പുതിയ ജീവിതം കേട്ടിപടുത്തി പഴയതിനെക്കാളും പതിനായിരം മടങ്ങ്‌ മെച്ചത്തില്‍ ആക്കിയതില്‍ അങ്ങ് തീര്‍ച്ചയായും വിജയം കണ്ടു.

ഇന്നും പല വിഷമങ്ങളിലും അധ്യമെത്തുന്ന മുഖം അങ്ങയുടെതാണ്. എല്ലാ ചോദ്യത്തിനും ഒരു ഉത്തരം, ഒരു പരിഹാരം അങ്ങേക്ക് പറഞ്ഞുതരാന്‍ ഉണ്ടാവും എന്നറിയാം. ഒരു പക്ഷെ അങ്ങ് നല്ലൊരു ഭര്‍ത്താവല്ല ( സ്നേഹം പ്രകടിപിക്കുന്ന കാര്യത്തില്‍, അമ്മയെ മനസിലാക്കുന്ന കാര്യത്തില്‍ ) എങ്കിലും നല്ലൊരു അച്ഛനാണ് എന്നത് എനിക്ക് നിശംശയം പറയാം. ഇന്നും ഞാന്‍ ഒറ്റക്കാണ്, ഇന്നെന്നെ വിശ്വസിച്ചു ഒരു പൊട്ടി പെണ്ണും, ഒരു കുഞ്ഞു ജീവനും ഉണ്ട്, എങ്കിലും എനിക്ക് ഇന്ന് വിഷമങ്ങള്‍ക്ക് ഒന്ന് വിളിക്കാനും, ചോദ്യങ്ങള്‍ക്ക് ഉത്തരമേകാനും അങ്ങ് മാത്രമേ ഉള്ളു. ചിലപ്പോള്‍ അങ്ങയുടെ ആശയങ്ങളോട് ഞാന്‍ വിയോജിപ്പ് പ്രകടിപ്പിക്കാറുണ്ട്, അതൊരിക്കലും അങ്ങയുടെ സ്ഥാനം കുറച്ചു കാണിക്കാന്‍ അല്ല, എന്‍റെ അറിവും, പരിചയവും അങ്ങയെ ബോധിപ്പിക്കുന്നു എന്ന് മാത്രം. ഇനിയും എന്‍റെ ജീവിതത്തില്‍ ഒരു വിളക്കായ്‌, ജീവനായ് ഒരു ശതം വര്‍ഷം ഉണ്ടാവണമേ എന്ന പ്രാര്‍ത്ഥനയോടെ, ഒരു സന്തോഷകരമായ “Fathers Day” ആശംസിക്കുന്നു..

അങ്ങയുടെ സ്വന്തം മകന്‍.

Post by Dhanesh Nair.

തമസോമ ജ്യോതിര്‍ഗമയ

എഴുത്ത് എന്നും എനിക്കൊരു ഹരമായിരുന്നു

അന്നവര്‍ പൈങ്കിളി എന്ന് വിളിച്ചു കളിയാക്കി

പിന്നെയവര്‍ സാഹിത്യ ബോധം തീരെ ഇല്ല എന്നും പറഞ്ഞു

എനിക്കന്നു ആകാശത്തിന്‍റെ താഴെ എന്തിനെ കുറിച്ചും എഴുതാമായിരുന്നു

പ്രകൃതി, പ്രേമം, കരച്ചില്‍, കാമം, ദുഃഖം, ദയ,

തുടങ്ങി എന്തിനെ കുറിച്ചും

എന്നാല്‍ ഇന്ന് സകലതും മാറി,

മരുഭുമിയില്‍ നനുത്ത ഉറവിടം തേടി നടക്കുന്ന ഒരു സഞ്ചാരിയെ പോലെ

പേനയും, പുസ്തകവുമായി ദിവസങ്ങള്‍ അലഞ്ഞു.

എന്‍റെ ചിന്തകള്‍ക്ക് ആരോ കൂച്ചു വിലങ്ങിട്ട പോലെ

ഒരുപക്ഷെ മുന്നില്‍ ഒരു ജീവിതം കത്തിയമര്‍ന്നത് കൊണ്ടാകാം,

അല്ലെങ്കില്‍ പരാജയങ്ങള്‍ മാത്രം ഏറ്റു വാങ്ങേണ്ടി വന്നതു കൊണ്ടുമാകാം

എഴുത്ത് എനിക്കിന്നു തീര്‍ത്തും അന്യമായിരിക്കുന്നു.

ജീവിതം ലക്ഷ്യമില്ലാതെ ചലിച്ചു കൊണ്ടേ ഇരുന്നു

വിജയവും പരാജയവും ഒന്നും അതിനെ ബാധിക്കാതെ ആയി

മനുഷ്യന്‍ എങ്ങനെയാണു മരണത്തെ വരിക്കുന്നത് എന്ന് ഞാന്‍ ഭീതിയോടെ ഓര്‍ത്തു.

അത് മാത്രമാണ് മുന്നിലെ ഏക വഴി എന്ന് തോന്നിപോയ നിമിഷങ്ങള്‍,

പക്ഷെ എന്നെ വിശ്വസിച്ച ജീവിതങ്ങളെ ഞാന്‍ ഓര്‍ത്തു.

മനസിന്നെ തളയ്ക്കാന്‍ ഞാന്‍ ആശ്രയിച്ചിരുന്ന മരുന്നുകളെ

ഞാന്‍ എന്നെന്നേക്കുമായി ഉപേക്ഷിച്ചു

പിന്നെയവള്‍ എന്‍റെ ജീവിതത്തിലേക്ക് കടന്നു വന്നു

തീര്‍ത്തും വിജനമായ എന്‍റെ വഴിത്താരയില്‍ ഒരു ആശ്വാസമായി

ഇന്ന് ഞാന്‍ ശരിക്കും ഭാഗ്യവാന്‍ എന്ന് വെറുതെ എങ്കിലും ഞാന്‍ മനസ്സില്‍ ഉറപ്പിച്ചു

ഉറക്കത്തിലെവിടെയോ ഇന്ന് ഞാന്‍ ഒരു പിന്ചോമനയുടെ ചിരി കേള്‍ക്കുന്ന പോലെ

ദുഖത്തിന്‍റെ അഴിയില്‍ മുങ്ങി പോകുമെന്ന് തോന്നുപോള്‍

ആശ്വാസത്തിന്‍റെ വഞ്ചിയുമായി അവള്‍ എന്നും എത്തുന്നത്‌ പോലെ

ജീവിതം തിരിച്ചു പിടിക്കാനുള്ള ഇ തത്രപ്പാടില്‍

പേനയും പുസ്തകവുമായി ഞാന്‍ വീണ്ടും തുടങ്ങുന്നു

അനുഗ്രഹിക്കും, ആശീര്‍വധിക്കും എന്ന പ്രതീക്ഷയോടെ

 

An Apology

Dear JustForUU

I am sorry. I was rude, unfaithful, disloyal to my only friend I ever had. Once my daily routine was to update you, check the traffic feed, and feel happy and proud to see people from all over the world click the link. I was either too happy those days, too sad, I had to impress, get impressed, prove my love and of course hide myself from the world and the only way to communicate with the outside world was you. Now I am not sure if it is a blessing or calmness before the storm I am enjoying these days. My personal life started settling down, calmness seems to have come back. But my life has gone off-track a lot. It had undergone a lot of changes, as someone rightly noted in their marriage ad, I am now moving on tabs. I am seeing a lot of permutation and combinations of tabs to keep me on track. I don’t have energy to do all those I use to do earlier but at-least bring back my life to a narrow track near what it was earlier.

Now coming back to our hide and seek; I was having a dinner with my ex-boss and CET Director, Schneider Electric; he told me that he was disappointed to see that my blog was life less without any updates. Those made me think that I should come back, come back full-fledged. Allow me to be friend with you again.

Regards,

Dhanesh Nair

Another attribute getting added

Till now people know me as a funny, short tempered person. They gave me honours of being outspoken and egoist. But there are few more attributes getting added. They found out that I am not caring, I dont love people and self centric. They also found that I am a machine who works on my parents instructions. Days back it was brother, then my parents and now me.

I have no regrets that they found the biggest secret ever. I was lost for couple of days but later I realised, why should I cry for person who dont worth.it. At least people near and dear to me knows me...As lyrics says  " I want it that way", I will remain the same and I want things in my way.

Route Map to Concorde Manhattans

Location Map

From Schneider GTCI to Concorde :

Schneider Electric Global Technology Center 88, 6th Rd, EPIP Zone Bangalore, Karnataka, India

1. Head toward 2B Rd south on 6th Rd 130 m
2. Turn left at 2B Rd 550 m
3. Turn right toward Varthur Rd 2.4 km
4. Turn right at S.V Exide Shoppe onto Varthur Rd Pass by Indian Oil Petrol Pump (on the left in 4.3 km) 5.6 km
5. At HAL Junction, continue onto Old Airport Rd Pass by HP Petrol Pump (on the left in 3.0 km) 4.2 km
6. Turn left toward Inner Ring Rd 260 m
7. Continue straight onto Inner Ring Rd Pass by AyurVAID Hospitals (on the left in 300 m) 5.2 km
8. Turn left at BOB Tech Solutions onto Hosur Rd Pass by The Bose Store (on the left) 130 m
9. Sharp left to stay on Hosur Rd Pass by Hanuman Temple (on the right) 190 m
10. Take the 3rd left onto Hosur Rd/National Highway 7 Continue to follow National Highway 7 Pass by Petrol Pump Madiwala (on the left) 1.5 km
11. Slight right onto Bangalore Elevated Tollway Limited 9.1 km
12. Continue onto 1st Main Rd Pass by State Bank of India (on the left) 650 m
13. Turn left onto Wipro Avenue Pass by Axis Bank ATM (on the left) 750 m
14. Slight right at Wipro Junction onto Neeladri Road Pass by Laddoos (on the right) 700 m
15. At Gate 16, continue onto Neeladri Rd 170 m

Concorde Manhattans Electronics City Bengaluru, Karnataka, India

Google Map location and Path

View Larger Map

From MountCarmel to Concorde Manhattans:

Mount Carmel College Palace Road, Vasanth Nagar Bengaluru, Karnataka, India 1. Head toward Palace Rd east on 8th Main Rd 11 m 2. Take the 1st right onto Palace Rd Pass by Consulate General of France (on the left) 750 m 3. Turn left at High Grounds Police Station onto Chowdaiah Rd/Sankey's Rd 110 m 4. Turn right onto Millers Rd Pass by Karnataka State Consumer Disputes Redressal Commission (on the right) 180 m 5. Slight right onto Raj Bhavan Rd Pass by High point Bldg (on the right) 54 m 6. Slight left onto Palace Rd Pass by Masjid (on the left) 800 m 7. Take the 2nd left 350 m 8. At the roundabout, take the 3rd exit onto Nrupathunga Rd Pass by Indian Oil (on the right in 450 m) 900 m 9. Slight left to stay on Nrupathunga Rd 61 m 10. At the roundabout, take the 2nd exit onto Kasturba Rd Pass by Hindustan Petrolium (on the right) 400 m 11. Turn left onto Kalinga Rao Rd Pass by MS Ramaiah College Of Education (on the right) 400 m 12. Turn right at Food Corporation Of India onto Lalbagh Rd Pass by Show Room (on the right) 1.1 km 13. Turn left at Aditya Technologies onto Marigowda Rd Go through 1 roundabout Pass by Petrol Pump (on the left in 450 m) 4.3 km 14. At Madivala Checkpost Signal, continue onto Hosur Rd Pass by St. John's Medical College (on the left in 650 m) 1.1 km 15. Sharp left to stay on Hosur Rd Pass by Hanuman Temple (on the right) 190 m 16. Take the 3rd left onto Hosur Rd/National Highway 7 Continue to follow National Highway 7 Pass by Petrol Pump Madiwala (on the left) 1.5 km 17. Slight right onto Bangalore Elevated Tollway Limited 9.1 km 18. Continue onto 1st Main Rd Pass by State Bank of India (on the left) 650 m 19. Turn left onto Wipro Avenue Pass by Axis Bank ATM (on the left) 750 m 20. Slight right at Wipro Junction onto Neeladri Road Pass by Laddoos (on the right) 700 m 21. At Gate 16, continue onto Neeladri Rd 170 m Concorde Manhattans Electronics City Bengaluru, Karnataka, India

Homeless to Homed

I was born in a kerala styled house called "Tharavaadu". It was huge, with many rooms inside, but too small ones. The house was clay roof tiled which kept me warm during winter season and cool during summer. With little more space around, it allowed me and friends to play thief and police, grocery shop, a farmer and what not. During heavy rainfall coconut use to fall in the room which generate cracks and I remember water dripping in through the walls and the platform below the roof called "Thattu" (Woodwork done to store things and increase the visual appearance of the rooms so that the roof won't be seen directly). Due to some reason we were forced to sell it off and moved to a new place. Since then I was never been permanently in my own house.


It took two years for us to finalize and complete the new house and ofcourse concrete one, but by then I joined my engineering where I stayed with my friends in a rented house. By 2004, I completed my engineering moved to Pune where I stayed as a guest in a cousin's house and then moved to rented apartments till I came to Bangalore.

After coming to Bangalore, I was staying with my grandmother in a rented apartment till 2009 (Almost since I got married) and moved to another, as a tenant after marriage. Though two more houses added which I can claim mine by now, I continued as a tenant and I hope things are changing.

If things go well with us, we are moving to our new apartment in Electronics City. Our neighbors are Siemens, Wipro and Infosys and the apartment is from the renowned builder "Concorde Group – 1000 crore conglomerate". Concorde Manhattans is their prestigious project with 926 apartments with all modern amenities attached below.

I don’t know what life have left for me, but this is the plan ten days down the line and I hope to have a fresh start leaving all miseries in the way and there by turning from a homeless to homed.

Blogging from my mobile

Time, its one thing the most busiest person and most laziest person in the world claims the ownership upon. I being definitely the member of later category found a shortcut to blog. I downloaded an app in my mobile so that I can blog when ever time permits. Here is the first attempt.

Bye Luttapi : I need to tell you this

He was my everything. He was with me for 5 years 3 months. Now I need to bid bye to him. Hope your new owner will take care of you better than me. I loved you a lot and I will love you. I at times felt that you had a brain, you sense my feelings. I know its rubbish in 2011, but it was really hard to part you. I couldnt stop tears rolling out. See you sometimes, some where in bangalore..

Added little memories of Luttapi in a different way, Take a look in my twitter account

http://twitter.com/#search?q=%23ilovemybike%20dhaneshnair

or check this
http://twitter.com/dhaneshnair/#ilovemybike

New blog for people under Depression

Depression is strange, Until and unless you are under severe depression things can get back to normal, but i realised that the people under depression requires help, support and care. I was thinking to start a blog for all those who are under depression, better place where you can share your thoughts, ideas, place where you can forget about your worries for a while.

Do you think its good.. mail me

Breaking the silence

It’s been some time I am active in my blogs. Life is always a mystery; you never know what it has for you. Now that I am alive, still doesn’t mean that I will be active in blogging any more. Thanks for being with me always and do check in some time to see my post and please don’t delete JustForUU from your favorites list. Do they call it writers block… not really I am busy now a days. My creative head is set aside for some time.

Then many people are still confused about what I do now? After leaving Philips it’s quite some time now. Now you might be thinking, as if entire world is looking forward for me and waiting to know my updates… no people, I don’t have any such thoughts but there are genuinely few people who follow my blog, I just meant them.
Well, After leaving a Philips, I joined a company called Schneider, Schneider Electric is a fortune 500 company based on France R&D center here in India, located whitefield, Bangalore. I joined as a Senior Software Engineer and now with in this short span I am Project Design Lead in Schneider. For those who don’t really understand what a PDL is, you can relate to a combination of Technical Manager and Design Expert. Of course it’s just because of your prayers and grace of God I am in this position and now you might have guessed why I back from blogging.

Interesting part is when I drive to office I get a lot of time, thanks to the Traffic Jam’s in Bangalore I compose songs, but normally due to hectic days I forget to jot it down and to recollect everything I lose the mood as well. There are quiet some events happening in my life, definitely I am going to update you all but till then please bear my mistakes and bless me for my deeds to be successful.

Another apology

It is never difficult to maintain your passion however busy you are, I know this fact. My blog readers seem to have ignored my blog because there was no activity recently in JustForUU. I sincerely apologize for my laziness, as my friend rightly said “Your blog started rusting”, I should have never allowed doing that. Actually last few months brought a lot of changes to me. I was moved from a quiet relaxed arena to a platform where I need to prove my credibility. My new job is quiet exciting and by Gods grace I am bombarded with responsibilities. I started adapting and enjoying these new responsibilities. It is necessary for my career growth and I am literally busy taking interviews, submitting designs and a lot such activities.
This should never be an excuse for me to forget my passion of blogging. I am online 24 x 7 which itself is a drastic improvement from what I was for last few months. I can also tweet though not frequently, thanks to my new DROID. Please bear my excuses and never be away from my blog, expecting your continuous comments and support.

For the creator of JustForUU

When they created an id for me

I get lot of friend requests after reading my blog. Few people type their comments and suggestions in the shout box also. I try to reply most of them irrespective of their gender where in I don’t reply if I feel that is from a fake id . Many of my friends knew about it, and they created a fake id called Shreya. Most interestingly the full name was shreya.t.nair@gmail.com. Once I got a mail asking for my photos on nature and the person who used the id said it was very nice. I mailed them to that ID because I do such things when my readers ask me to. Normally lot of people send me message through mail, chat and even anonymous chats through leave a message option.
After a day she added me to gtalk and started chatting with me. I checked the ip from which she was chatting and that was from a US proxy. I even asked her if she is working somewhere and she replied that she is a student. She often pinged me at my work and I thought that she was real.
Second day itself I told her that I am engaged and chat continued like that. Some days after I saw her online, since we were chatting more about blog, photography and those topics of my interested, I pinged her. Quiet some time I didn’t saw her online. I felt some missing links in between, US proxy, Shreya and Nair (Normally people don’t combine such names)
Recently we had a sendoff party, in which my colleague came and asked if I know Shreya. All my missing links came together for me to visualize the trap. I went in to the chat to know if I had told anything wrong (It was not because I don’t believe me, but just to confirm that I didn’t say anything which was not needed). Actually I feel proud about it, if some people spend a lot of effort in making fool of you then you really are someone to be admired. Thanks guys for making me realize that. Any ways I don’t have any hard feelings on that.

Dhanus Favorites - 2009

I learned that revealing everything is not necessary than the matter of interest for you. So i have removed the references made to people here

My Idol : APJ Abdul Kalam

Favorite English Movie: Quantum of Solace
Favorite Hindi Movie: Dostana
Favorite Malayalam Movie: Twenty20
Favorite Tamil Movie: Vaaranam Ayiram

Favorite English Song: Addicted (Enrique)
Favorite Hindi Song: Guzarish(Ghajini)
Favorite Malayalam Song: Manjil Kulikkum (Veruthe Oru Bharya)
Favorite Tamil Song: Mundhinam Parthene (Vaaranam Ayiram)
Favorite English Actor: Daniel Craig
Favorite Hindi Actor: Sharukh Khan
Favorite Malayalam Actor: Mohan Lal
Favorite Tamil Actor: Vijay
Favorite English Actress: Julia Roberts
Favorite Hindi Actress: Deepika Padukone
Favorite Malayalam Actress: Bhama
Favorite Tamil Actress: Asin

Favorite English Singer: Enrique Iglesias
Favorite Hindi Singer: Udit Narayan
Favorite Malayalam Singer: M.G. Sreekumar
Favorite Tamil Singer: S.P. Balasubramaniam
Favorite Music Director : A.R. Rahman
Favorite Graphics Movie : Wanted
Favorite Animated Movie : Resident Evil

Favorite Place : Kollemcode
Favorite Foreign Location : Switzerland
Favorite Work Spot : Netherlands
Favorite Company : Philips
Favorite Suiting Brand : Louis Philipe
Favorite Pen : Parker
Favorite Jeans: Lee
Favorite Shirt Brand : Kourtons
Favorite Dress : Designer Full Sleeve Open T Shirt, Blue Jeans

Favorite Regional Newspaper: Mathrubhumi
Favorite Indian English Newspaper: Times of India
Favorite English News Channel : Times Now
Favorite Regional News Channel : Asianet News

Favorite Color : Black
Favorite Bike : Passion Plus
Favorite Dream Bike : Yamaha R1
Favorite Car : Honda Civic
Favorite Dream Car: Mercedes Benz S Class

Favorite Operating System: Windows Vista
Favorite Processor : AMD Athlon Dual Core
Favorite Laptop : Acer 4520

Favorite Programming Language : Vc++.Net 2005
Favorite Technology : .Net
Favorite Search Engine : Google
Favorite Blog : http://justforuu.dhaneshnair.com/
Favorite e-Shop : IndiaPlaza
Favorite Chat : Gtalk
Favorite Mail : Gmail
Favorite Photo Cast : Picasa
Favorite Networking Site : Orkut
Favorite Podcast : GCast
Favorite Matrimonial Site: Jeevansathi
Favorite Reference Site : Codeguru
Favorite Counter : statcounter
Favorite Online Dictionary : freedictionary

Favorite Food : Punjabi
Favorite Chicken : Butter Chicken
Favorite Soup : Chicken Manchow Soup
Favorite Sweet : Chilled Rasgula
Favorite Timepass : Watching Movie
Favorite Hobby : Photography , Poem Writing and Composing
Favorite SoftDrink : Coke
Favorite Juice : Litchie
Favorite Cofee : Grandmug (Cofee Day)

Favorite School : Vidyadhiraja
Favorite College : Jec

Favorite Trip : Trip To Nederlands
Favorite Play Indoor : Chess
Favorite Play Outdoor : Cricket
Favorite PLAYER (INDOOR): Vishwanathan Anand
Favorite PLAYER (OUT DOOR): Sachin Tendulkar

And it happened like this

My parents were not able to bear my torture, rather they were jealous seeing me single, decided to tie me up with a girl who can turn a big red "cross" for me in future. Despite of my continuous request, that I am not prepared for a marriage, they started hunting for their future in law. My Dad started seeing girls for me, and most of them were ignored considering my so called expectations (Well the secret is that those were excuses to get out of the risk). Finally they found a girl and want me to meet her by any means. I was not at all happy with the decision and I told them that I cant see her until i know about her.

On a weekend I went home for some personal reasons and they shown the photograph to me. I told them that I am not interested. My Dad was upset as he expect the girl to be there in the hometown just to see me. I told them that I would meet her for namesake and I also told him that the decision will be taken by me, regarding how to proceed further.

My Dad called up her parents to let them know our willingness to meet her on Saturday. From then on calls started flowing from there saying the girl have reached several districts of Tamil Nadu and almost to reach out place. I told my Dad, it seems tricky also told him that it wont take that much time for her to reach here. Real matter of interest is, her parents told Dad that she have reached a particular place by 11 o clock and the next city by 4.00. I was thinking that she would have reached the place before, if she have started walking from there. I started cribbing and I told my parents to ignore me for the time and let them meet her. Finally her parents convinced my Dad that they will make arrangements for the meeting by next day. I was busy with some other activities next day, so My Dad told them that we will reach there by 7.30 in the morning.

Though I was angry with my parents decision, I was a bit excited as it was my first meeting of such kind. I was asked to wake up by 4.30(God, I could have done it during my exams), Dressed up and got into the car by 6.30 along with my Younger Bro, Dad and my cousin. I was imagining the girl coming up to me with tea cup and face hung up with shyness. I was thinking of the importance of such dumb ceremony.

I reached the place. No network for my mobile, pretty strange where neighbours staring at us (Might be thinking what these guys are doin in the morning). My Dad was upset by the surrounding. He told me that he could have come first. I was almost about to burst, but controlled my anger. We went inside the hall. The hall was arranged very strangely. Her parents were busy in preparing the tea for us. They started calling her out of the room. I was wondering, how people behave so strange and how do they feel so shy in this century. Finally she managed to come out. I was shocked as she didnt even bother to dress up well. She gave the Tea cup to me, not even worried to show a formal respect to guest. Another shocking experienced followed as she dropped the Tea Tray there in the table and went in. I was furious by the time. I stood up, and started walking out. My Dad asked me, if i need to ask her something. Out of anger I couldnt speak. I just told him to follow me as I went out.

Later the day, a call came for me. I took the call and the person at the other end started asking my personal number. I was surprised thinking why a stranger would need that. Finally he revealed that he was her boyfriend. I almost exploded.. dont even remember how i scolded him. I should thank God, for making him to call me coz I could have shown that anger to my parents. He was begging sorry as her parents should never know about it. Though sounds funny, a real embarassing moment in lifetime.. So thats my first attempt .. whats yours?

Send it in dhanus@dhaneshnair.in

What ever I thought in five minutes - II

This time I was thinking about something which was really in my mind for some time. How do I rate myself? I was reviewing my own creations. I was under an impression that what ever I was working on is just fantastic. I never thought of reviewing my work and when my reader gives me a comment that the poem or article is good then everything was fine for me. I wish to write poems where common people can understand. I have never let my words to be very tough because everything I write is published in my blog and most of my readers are either techies or people who google to find out poems. I never read poem written by others other than those I read during my school days because I was afraid that would influence me.

I recently heard some poems written by Anil Panachooran, a famous lyrist in Malayalam. I started doubting about my creations. Is that really poems? Many of his poems are written in much simple Malayalam and in such a way that every poem has a tune and words are properly organized. During my college days, I heard some albums released by East Coast group, amazing one. I just became fan of those albums, because the lines were as if it came from my heart. ITs queit normal that every guys and girls go ‘fida’ during college days. I was impressed and I felt happy in hearing those songs than hearing a good and most appreciated poems.

It doesn’t mean that other poems didn’t impress me. I just love the poems written by Vayalar Ramavarmma ( I once got an A grade in state level Vayalar Kavitha Recitation Competion) and those written by Madhusoodanan Nair. I like poems of O.N.V also, but a few of them. May be that I didn’t read much of his poems.

Few of my friends who read my blog keep on asking about my latest poems. Due to their compulsion I keep writing poems mostly on love. Many of those are written to impress people when I was in my college days and now for my blog. I have common subjects for my poems; it could be Love, Nature, Separation, Depression and Expectation. I never came out of these subjects other than in some of my poems. My mom is great critic of my poems. Though she doesn’t understand much technical in it, she tries to give me some suggestions about the poem. Now much of my regular readers stopped commenting on my poems. But I am really happy when new people who see my blog and send me the comments and the words of appreciation about it. That’s why I decided to publish them. I don’t know how long I will write, but one thing I am sure is that I write when I am completely bored and nothing else to do. Good, because I understand you patience. Even with that u might have felt like killing me when you see the updates on the blog.
I think thats enough for five minutes :) . Keep visiting my blog.

Don’t worry, though may not be for a long time I will keep bugging you guys through my blog. I will be expecting your comments and suggestion, because that is the one which force me to write more.

I am like this…

Many of my friends know that I like Enrique Iglesias songs. If I say that I am a fan of some one then its Enrique Iglesias because of song selection, voice and commitment to his song. I feel he is involved in his songs very much. And people, don’t think that I am one among those people who are fascinated by English song and culture. Nope... You are wrong in understanding me. Only English songs I prefer to hear is from Enrique and Backstreet Boys. Come on buddy that’s enough. What is that u intend to say. We are bored now!! Sorry guys. I am like this … This post is for all my readers, friends and closest who never tried to know about me but still feel that what’s wrong with this guy :) ?.

Okie ... Dude if u meant to say about u… Why that starting intro about Enrique? Kewl people, relax. Coming to the point!!!!! I love Enrique’s song. Just gave an intro about my favorite singer and my favorite band. I want to refer to a song sung by Backstreet Boys…
I want it that way … You can watch this video in this link

But we are two worlds apart

Can't reach to your heart

When you say

That I want it that way

It is a general attitude for you to be soft when you meet other people. Let it be your friend or relative or some people who may turn part and parcel of your life. You bend your bones to adjust with their attitude with an intention of making things better. Later on, when he/she is much closer to you, you will feel bored about the relation and will change your affection towards them and problems will creep in to your relation, which will in turn crack the wall and finally a huge destruction. And as a result both of you will go on for a hunt of other relationships or will be in enmity in rest of life.

It’s quiet common for people to make a perception about me when they meet or have a chat with me. I don’t make friends fast, I take time to accept them as my friend and I also feel that it’s important for them to understand me. For me, relationship or friendship is not just a part of time. It’s a part of life. If a person made a mistake of being my friend, I will make sure that I won’t create trouble for them in any means. I give importance to them in all aspects. From the day they meet me, I will give them the clear indication about my character, my way of living and my preferences. Let it be my colleague whom I consider my good friend or other friends whom I consider important in my life.

In my school days I was different. I believe on people very fast and become attached to them soon. Though the character remains unchanged, I have improved my maturity to decide on people whom I have to depend on and whom not to. I hate those relations who approach people just for the time sake or purpose and finally say good bye when they have accomplished the mission. After months or days research and development they will decide my ways to be untrustworthy, emotional and bad tempered. I know I am all these things. I am hundred percentile emotional. I use to describe myself as 50% senti and 50% mental. I am bad tempered. I don’t go behind favors, so do I expect from others. I don’t prefer people to be given preference ignoring my contribution in their life or work. I am very much self centric, egoistic and rough by nature. But I show this attitude to only those people whom I don’t want to be with. I am bad tempered and emotional. If you remember guys, I was the same when I met you but you never bothered those issues. And when rest of things goes out of your expectation, where in a state that you are not bothered about others feelings and actions you will realize that my character was not up to the mark. There comes the contradiction between boon and curse :). Days back you believed that you are the luckiest to have my friendship and days later you realize that it was a curse. Then you start realizing that other people around you are better than me.

Now I can see that we're falling apart

From the way that it used to be, yeah

No matter the distance

I want you to know

That deep down inside of me...

This article is meant for everyone. It was just nurtured out of self analysis on me. I have seen relationships growing and breaking in front of me. Some days back I was having very good dreams about marriage, till I discussed with few of my friends who face problems on their life after marriage. May be it’s an after effect of today’s growth on economy and fastness of life. Eight out of Ten friends who are married are giving me an input that things will be superb for first one month, and then it’s difficult. Few of my friends found an idea to solve this. One is to marry a girl who is not willing to work. Their analysis was the demand for money will always remain even if you marry a working partner. Some others have an idea of marrying a girl who is not so educated were they can command on them. I was thinking a way where everything could be brought in. I dont want my life to be that of my neighbour. I am not interested to make a person as my partner and then feel worried about it. My life is precious for me and i really dont have to time worry about it as I do feel worried about other unnecessary things. That’s the reason I was analyzing my own life, what went wrong with me, my relationship with my family members and friends.

Every one believes that they are the hero in their life, from a normal person who works as a coolie to the owner of Microsoft. Yes, in one or the other extend they are. Some people might have proved to be a hero with in a group of people and some in his own life. When I am considered as a social element, my family members believe that I am the best among all and they treat me as king. When you feel that your position is unchallenged you will never have problems in life. From all these things, I derive a line of approach which could make you feel better in your life.

Be yourselves when you interact with others. Never raise anyone above the limit where you can’t afford and never lower them were they can’t afford. If you show very loyal and caring to other person, he will expect you to be the same life long. All of a sudden you decide to be independent and started showing your attitude to them, remember that you will be on trouble soon. Decide if you can be a better friend or partner for the other person. All that glitters are not gold. If you feel some of his/ her character is not of your expectation then, stop a while, think and then proceed.

I wish to tell you people. I am like this… I want it that way. I know it’s difficult for you. So be aware of what other person is of and set your boundaries. I am self centric, emotional, possessive, bad tempered and egoistic. If you know my good characters its fine, if not you might not have become my friend yet.

This session of torture is over, make sure you wont read anything of such kind further.

My Travel in Mercedes Benz

When i came out from airport in Amsterdams, the taxi driver was directing me to taxi. I saw some mercedes benz and volks wagon there. I was quiet amused to see that. Was dreaming to go on one of those cars. Well it was long time dream for me.. I know it wont be a dream for many people but for me travelling in Mercedes was a dream. And my dream is gonna get true .. wow! I was excited..! We crossed the volks wagon .. Well no problem next is mercedes.. Hmm ..gr8. He passed thru that way aswell .. :(.. and took me to a toyota. It was a really nice car.. but I was upset..!

Then days after, it was necessary for me to register myself in the police station there to make it official that I have reached here in Netherlands. I went to police station. Kewl .. Its like a lobby of a star hotel. We were asked to be seated and they gave us the form to be filled. (Comon Dhanesh, too much .. we we we ?? Right .. Dont worry will introduce my friend (Bhai -Brother) also. His name is Piyush from PIC bangalore) . Though I didnt get a chance to visit a police station ( God .. I m scared of that coz of the treatment there :) .. ) in India, but from the movie information .. this is great for me to imagine even. After that we were late.. And we were sure that we will miss the pickup from BEST station to Philips. So we decided to get a taxi.

Taxi .. There comes our great Mercedes .. kewl ... I got into it. Just for five minutes travel he charges 600 Rs .. but it was great .. My another dream fullfilled .. Now I need to own one ;-) .. Guys so u know my wishlist and my account number is ********* (secret) .. Mail me :)

dhanus Favorite List - 2008

Favorite Person in the World : Vava (My Brother)

My Breath : My Family
My Idol : APJ Abdul Kalam

Best Friend : Sreejith S

Favorite Class Met : Suthan T
Favorite Room Met: Rahul Bhasker
Favorite Friend from Chinchwad : Sandeep Adhau
Favorite Friend from Bangalore : Sreeja Nair
Favorite from Wipro : Pushpa Pote
Favorites from Philips : Anand Subhash, Sureshbabu Swamynathan

Favortie Friends I ever met : My FSF Team Members, Antony Lijo, Jegan R, Shirish Patil, Nilesh, Uday.

Favorite English Movie: Mission Impossible 3
Favorite Hindi Movie: Jab We Met
Favorite Malayalam Movie: Chocolate
Favorite Tamil Movie: Billa

Favorite English Song: Addicted (Enrique)
Favorite Hindi Song: Ankhen Teri (Anwar)
Favorite Malayalam Song: Neeyinnente Swantham Alle (Kalabam)
Favorite Tamil Song: Katrin Mozhi (Mozhi)
Favorite English Actor: BradPitt
Favorite Hindi Actor: Sharukh Khan
Favorite Malayalam Actor: Mohan Lal
Favorite Tamil Actor: Madhavan
Favorite English Actress: Julia Roberts
Favorite Hindi Actress: Vidya Balan
Favorite Malayalam Actress: Meera Jasmine
Favorite Tamil Actress: Shreya Sharan

Favorite English Singer: Enrique Iglesias
Favorite Hindi Singer: Udit Narayan
Favorite Malayalam Singer: M.G. Sreekumar
Favorite Tamil Singer: S.P. Balasubramaniam
Favorite Music Director : A.R. Rahman
Favorite Graphics Movie : Transformers
Favorite Animated Movie : Shark Tale

Favorite Place : Kollemcode
Favorite Foreign Location : Switzerland
Favorite Work Spot : Netherlands
Favorite Company : Philips
Favorite Suiting Brand : Louis Philipe
Favorite Pen : Parker
Favorite Jeans: Lee
Favorite Shirt Brand : Kourtons
Favorite Dress : Designer Full Sleeve Open T Shirt, Black Jeans

Favorite Regional Newspaper: Mathrubhumi
Favorite Indian English Newspaper: Times of India
Favorite English News Channel : Times Now
Favorite Regional News Channel : Asianet News

Favorite Color : Black
Favorite Bike : Passion Plus
Favorite Dream Bike : Yamaha R1
Favorite Car : Honda City
Favorite Dream Car: Mercedes Benz S Class

Favorite Operating System: Windows Vista
Favorite Processor : AMD Athlon Dual Core
Favorite Laptop : Acer 4520

Favorite Programming Language : Vc++.Net 2005
Favorite Technology : .Net
Favorite Search Engine : Google
Favorite Blog : http://justforuu.dhaneshnair.in
Favorite e-Shop : IndiaPlaza
Favorite Chat : Gtalk
Favorite Mail : Gmail
Favorite Photo Cast : Picasa
Favorite Networking Site : Orkut
Favorite Podcast : GCast
Favorite Matrimonial Site: Jeevansathi
Favorite Reference Site : Codeguru
Favorite Counter : easycounter
Favorite Online Dictionary : freedictionary

Favorite Food : Punjabi
Favorite Chicken : Butter Chicken
Favorite Sweet : Chilled Rasgula
Favorite Timepass : Watching Movie
Favorite Hobby : Poem Writing and Composing
Favorite SoftDrink : Coke
Favorite Juice : Litchie
Favorite Cofee : Grandmug (Cofee Day)

Favorite Sir: Jeyan Sir
Favorite Teacher : Madonna Ma'm
Favorite School : Vidyadhiraja
Favorite College : Jec

Favorite Trip : Trip To Nederlands
Favorite Play Indoor : Chess
Favorite Play Outdoor : Cricket
Favorite PLAYER (INDOOR): Vshwanathan Anand
Favorite PLAYER (OUT DOOR): Sachin Tendulkar

Some Friends from Bangalore are ignored intentionally because I dont know if they like their names to be in my blog.

My Most Favorite Person in the World

I was watching the movie "Hey Babby". If I like some movie to some extend... I watch it in full swing. I was amused to see the trio in the movie struggling with that kid. And their pain (I didn’t like any of those actors expression) when they missed the baby. My mind went few years back when my brother was born. This post is about him.

I was too small at that time. I was doing my sixth standard. I was so eager to see my brother. It was totally in a different mood when compared to my sister’s birth. I was worried that my parents won’t take care of me as they were giving importance to my sister. Kid in me got hurt to tat extend that I tried hurting her with a burning incense stick (My parents make fun of me till now ...quoting that instance. I am possessive in every aspect). But my brother was different. I was eagerly waiting for his birth. I was sure that it will be a baby boy and found a name for him. Vava. I still remember the first time I saw him, such a small baby. I was worried it could hurt him, if I took him in my hand.

He came home. He became my world, my happiness. I use to come running from the school to see him. I took all responsibility of him, starting from feeding him, playing with him, singing lullabies for him and making him sleep. I use to tell him stories. He is more fascinated with super hero stories. I created a fictional character called "Kukkudu Vandi", a super car which take care of kids and get them tons of chocolates, Ice cream. (Recently I asked him if he remembers my stories. He said no. I was a bit upset. He was so worried that he explained that he was too small at that time. He asked me to tell those stories again.. I don’t wan no bore him this time :-). So I refused ;-) ).

One funny thing we do is that we both fight sometimes. It won’t last for ten minutes. If it is his mistake, he will come to me saying "Chetta(Brother), Yes friends". I will make my face serious replying him, "No Vave, No Friends". He will run complaining to my mom saying "Mumma, Chettan Yes Friends Parayunilla (Mom, brother is not saying Yes Friends". After two minutes... I will go back to him saying yes friends.

Many of you know that I am very sentimental. I don’t wan no make him like that. I love to stay in home but I asked him to meet people outside. I taught him what ever I know. He learned to format my machine when he was in fourth standard. He is interested with action games. We both play Maxpayen till Four-O’clock in the morning. I got admission for my Engineering course. Only thing which was worrying me is that I won’t be able to see him on week days. I never use to stay in my rented house during my college days. I always use to come back to see him.

Now it became a usual thing that I stay away from him. I hardly see him once in two months. But I make sure that I talk to him daily. He becomes upset if I miss to talk with him. I have a dream that I should never let him wait for any of his wish list. I know each and every one of his friends including girls. He is smart (Not like me)... Lot many use to propose him. He calls me up saying these entire incidents. When I go home, I use to roam a lot with him.

Recently I went home. My mom showed me an exam paper (Its mandatory that parents have to sign each papers in my brothers school). He was asked to write about the most favorite person in this world. Every one wrote about Mahatma Gandhi, Nehru... etc and he wrote about me. I don’t know if I am that good, to be his favorite. But my eyes became wet after reading that. He was awarded 9 out of 10 and he was appreciated among his friends in the class by his teacher.

Today is his birthday... I WISH U A VERY HAPPY BIRTHDAY VAVE...